Did you remember that it’s almost Father’s Day? I’m sorry if this is how you’re finding out, but surely there’s still enough time for you to go out and buy some whiskey stones or a World War II book, or whatever else we’ve been tricked into believing fathers are into. Besides, we all know this holiday isn’t really about gifts; it’s about calling up your dad so he can ask you whether you’ve paid your estimated quarterly taxes. But Father’s Day is much more than just celebrating your own dad—it’s a time to reflect on all of the wonderful, and sometimes terrible, fathers from across pop culture. After all, who do you actually spend more time with? Your real father? Or Peter Griffin? That’s what I thought. So let’s take a look at some of the most iconic dads in pop culture, remembering the pivotal roles they play, and assessing whether or not they’re actually good fathers:
Sam Carmichael, Harry Bright, and Bill Anderson (Mamma Mia)
If you recognize these famous fathers by name alone, you’re on the right track in life. These, of course, are Sophie’s three potential fathers in the Mamma Mia stage and cinematic universe—each more delightful than the last. Can they sing? No, not always, but that’s not important. What’s important is that all three of them were eager and willing to step up and claim Sophie as their own.
Mike Brady (The Brady Bunch TV Show)
Gay guy in a straight show—what more could you ask for?
Mike Brady (The Brady Bunch Movie)
Straight guy in a gay movie—what more could you ask for?
Papa
Ah yes, the classic recurring character who pops up throughout the history of music. He “don’t preach” to Madonna, he “was a rollin’ stone” for The Temptations, and according to James Brown, he’s “got a brand new bag.” Barbra Streisand even wonders if he can hear her. The man gets around.
Madonna filming the video for her song Papa Don't Preach in New York City, 1986
Lydia Tár (Tár)
She is, admittedly, Petra’s father. She also dresses better than most fathers, though her politics likely align with theirs. All problematic qualities get a free pass because of Cate Blanchett, obviously.
King Triton (The Little Mermaid)
Men get a gigantic set of pecs and think they can get away with anything—including keeping their daughter from pursuing her dreams. But Triton’s impact doesn’t stop with The Little Mermaid: Taylor Swift’s “But Daddy I Love Him” is a clear nod to Ariel’s protests, so he gets some credit for bringing about a truly perfect song.
Waymond Wang (Everything Everywhere All At Once)
For as wonderful as the character of Waymond was in the film, let's be real—our adoration all comes down to the electric Ke Huy Quan and his whirlwind, joy-filled awards campaign. It was such an exciting comeback story to watch play out, culminating with the Oscar win that absolutely everybody was rooting for.
Wayne Szalinski (Honey, I Shrunk The Kids)
While we love Rick Moranis and hope his forthcoming return to the screen for Spaceballs 2 is a sign of more to come, his behavior as the father in Honey, I Shrunk The Kids was completely unacceptable. The first thing they teach you at parenting school is not to shrink the kids, and what does this doofus do? Shrink the kids!
Sandy Cohen (The O.C.)
I actually have nothing to say about Sandy Cohen’s parenting or his role in the plot of The O.C. All I want to address is his eyebrows. They’re a truly iconic set, rivaled only by fellow famous father Eugene Levy (American Pie or Schitt’s Creek, take your pick because the brows are browing in either example).
Hiram Lodge (Riverdale)
I’ll never forget where I was when it was revealed that Veronica’s incarcerated father, Hiram, was set to be released from prison and would join them in Riverdale—I was watching Riverdale at the time, of course. Though an undeniably bad father and the central antagonist of the series, his portrayer, Mark Consuelos, is just the opposite. Any fan of Live! knows him to be a great dad to his and Kelly Ripa’s three kids, including his oldest, Michael (who happened to play young Hiram in an episode of Riverdale—what are the odds!) and youngest Joaquin (who coincidentally is making his Broadway debut in Death of a Salesman at the same time his father is doing the same in Fallen Angels).
Hot Priest (Fleabag)
Is this cheating? I don’t know, why bother introducing logic into this round-up now? He’s a priest, so in the literal sense, he is a Father. And he paved the way for hot priests everywhere—by which I mean Josh O’Connor in Wake Up Dead Man and Stanley Tucci in Conclave. You heard me!
The Dad from Inside Out
It’s cliché at this point, but it’s cliché for a reason. How could we not include him and his mustache? Happy, perverts?
Julius (Everybody Hates Chris)
Terry Crews was so good playing the hardworking, famously frugal father to Chris that even just seeing an image of him in character will make you watch your spending. In fact, that’s why one Twitter user tried to put his face on their debit card—with Crews’s approval.
Nick Parker (The Parent Trap)
I hate this absolute rat bastard. You’re telling me not only do you fumble Natasha Richardson, but you voluntarily give up custody of one of your daughters…presumably never to be seen again? On top of that, you start dating the 26-year-old Meredith Blake—a literal CHILD! A sick and twisted freak who doesn’t deserve even the smallest sampling of Chessy’s chili.
Homer Simpson
Listen, someone has to say it: Bart deserved at least some of those stranglings. Plus, Homer is pro-renewable energy and pro-donuts. What more can you ask for?
The Wizard of Oz (Wicked)
Don’t let Jeff Goldblum (or Joel Grey if ya nasty) fool you, this is not a good man. If anybody EVER offers you some green elixir, do not accept.
The Mandalorian
I’ll be completely honest…I have no idea what the relationship between The Mandalorian and Grogu is apart from scene partners. I’d imagine at this point he’s sort of an adoptive father, or at least guardian? But who knows, maybe they’re just coworkers, and I’m projecting a parasocial relationship onto them the way people assumed Sarah Jessica Parker and Kim Cattrall were friends in real life.
Goofy
A Goofy Movie and An Extremely Goofy Movie are must-see Father’s Day programming, featuring perhaps the best father ever put to screen: Goofy. His son, Max, naturally struggles with having a goofy father, as anybody might. But God forbid an adult seeks out a higher education!
Geppetto (Pinocchio)
He wanted to be a father so badly that he made a kid out of wood, only to immediately lose him, and then got swallowed by a whale trying to find him. So while his heart was in the right place, maybe he was better equipped to father a puppet instead of a real boy after all.
Logan Roy (Succession)
He’s a terrible father, but you can at least root for him because his kids are also terrible. Bonus points because his name is also a rap.
Olivia Rodrigo’s therapist father
She shouted him out on “Get Him Back!” by singing, “I am my father’s daughter, so maybe I could fix him.” And now, with her new album, you seem pretty sad for a girl so in love, it’s abundantly clear that this is the daughter of a therapist. How else could she be so wise and attuned to her emotions?
