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What to Expect From the 2022 Golden Globes? Not Much at All.

The new 2009 Golden Globe statuettes are on display during an unveiling by the Hollywood Foreign Pre...
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No one expected the Golden Globes to be its usual champagne-fueled self when its 79th edition rolls around this Sunday. A-listers haven’t looked back since denouncing with the Hollywood Foreign Press Association last May, citing the group’s lack of transparency and diversity (which made for not even a single Black member). Tom Cruise returned his three statuettes; Scarlett Johansson called for a boycott. NBC decided that the HFPA’s need for “meaningful reform” was so dire, they would break with tradition and not air the show, which was then a full eight months away. Well, heads up: It’s time to lower those expectations even further.

Tuesday brought a series of developments that all but guarantees the awards ceremony will be positively bleak. For starters, the HFPA has decided to do away with one of the Globes (let alone any award show)’s biggest draws: the red carpet. It did not specify a reason for forgoing the step-and-repeat when confirming the news to Page Six. Optimists could point to the current surge in coronavirus cases, but it was sure looking like the red carpet would be empty well before Omicron rolled around. Case in point: Tuesday also brought news that the HFPA has failed to secure any celebrity presenters, per an email from the Globes talent booker obtained by Variety.

As if to make up for the loss, the email emphasized the HFPA’s plans to “celebrate and honor a variety of diverse, community-based programs” and creatives across the industry. Whoever does end up attending the “small event” will have to show proof of vaccination and booster shot, as well as a negative Covid-19 test taken within 48 hours of the show. An official email sent out after Variety posted its report states that guests will also have to commit to wearing a face mask and socially distance “at all times.”

At least there’s one source of solace for the HFPA, thanks to none other than Snoop Dogg. The internet positively delighted in the rapper’s announcement of the nominees last month, which was peppered with mispronunciations like “Dennis Villanueva” and “Bean Aff-fleck.”