Photographs: Shawn Brackbill

__Abramović, Marina__
The artist reached her Kickstarter goal with the help of Lady Gaga. Now owes her a hug.

Angelou, Maya
Starring in Cole Haan’s newest advertising campaign; will encourage women to purchase comfortable footwear.

Changed her hair again. This is just getting dull.

Campbell, Naomi
Ran into her ex-boyfriend at a bar. What happens in Ibiza, stays in Ibiza.

de la Renta, Oscar
Is seriously cutting down his fashion week list. How exclusive.

The now-defunct magazine is making a digital comeback much to the delight of home lovers everywhere.

Dunn, Jourdan
Gets very, very naked for GQ. Reminds everyone that it is a men’s magazine.

East Coasters
Apparently wear more makeup than women on the West Coast. Duh.

McCartney, Stella
Collaborating with Gwyneth Paltrow’s GOOP on a TBA adventure. The anticipation is killing us.

McNeil, Catherine
Got a gap in her teeth for a Lauren Hutton-inspired fashion spread.

Mizrahi, Isaac
Is apparently writing a TV pilot.

Murakami, Takashi
The artist is now collaborating with Shu Uemeura on a collection of makeup. To be worn on the East Coast only.

One Direction
Will perform at the Victoria’s Secret fashion show this year. Continues to live every teenage boys fantasy.

Pannettiere, Hayden
Gets bangs; makes headlines.

Rag & Bone
Collaborates with Hunter on a line of wellies; conveniently announced on a rainy day.

May play Josephine Baker in an upcoming film. Will be forced to change her hair yet again.

Would like to dress Vin Diesel, of all people.

Will be available across the country, thanks to Nordstrom.

Versace, Donatella
Publically thanked Lady Gaga for writing a song about her. Outdoes Marina Abramovic’s hug.

Wilson, Eric
Counted all of the naked breasts in W’s September 2013 issue for The New York Times. Glad you’re paying attention!