In one of the cleverest sketches of the season so far, Saturday Night Live's cold open for its Sterling K. Brown–hosted episode parodied liberals' slowly waning faith that special counsel Robert Mueller will get Trump impeached via, of all things, a Bachelor parody. On the finale of the most recent season of The Bachelor, bachelor Arie un-proposed to winner Becca and confessed that, actually, his heart was really set on Lauren. He then followed Becca around for a few minutes making her and the audience madly uncomfortable as everyone involved realized, wow, this is really not working out.
In the SNL version, an almost word-for-word replica of the Bachelor bit, Becca (Cecily Strong) is instead let down by Mueller (Kate McKinnon), who confesses that although he really thought he could make collusion work, it looks like obstruction of justice is where the investigation is headed. A heartbroken Becca, channeling the majority of Americans, despairs, "So that's it? He's just gonna be president?"
"So I have to wait two more years for him to be out of office?" asks Becca, to which Mueller replies, "Honestly, probably six," and the rest of America responds, "Arghhhhh."
There is, if not good news, a hint of a silver lining. As Mueller points out in the sketch, it's not like we'd be much better off under President Pence, and Jared Kushner is on his way out of the administration, or as he puts it, "the Kush is cooked." And Becca will be the next Bachelorette, which is great for Becca but not of much help to the rest of us, who are stuck with Trump like, well, a bad boyfriend who just won't leave.
Cringe at the hysterical and far too real sketch here, and then take a cold shower. We gotta get realistic: