According to Frieze and Art Basel, the Future of Art Fairs Is Aboard Superyachts

Great news for Leonardo DiCaprio, who’s wont is to spend his day aboard yachts in the company of both his 21-year-old girlfriend (under the supervision of her mother) and the billionaire David Geffen, and is also the perennial VIP star of the art fair Frieze. His two luxury interests are now combining, thanks to a seaside stand-off between Frieze and Art Basel, both of which are planning to launch “boutique art fairs” aboard so-called Floating Freeport Ships. (Or, as they’ll apparently soon be known, FSFs.)

According to the Art Newspaper, both Frieze and Art Basel are currently on the hunt for the vessel most suited to their purposes, i.e., tempting collectors to throw caution to the coastal wind with their purchases—which, by the way, will be tax-free.

Both Frieze Floats and Basel Boats will reportedly play host to around 35 galleries apiece, which is quite the downgrade from the usual. (Frieze New York featured 190 galleries last year, whereas Art Basel had 268,000 and nearly 300,000 at its Miami Beach and Switzerland locations, respectively.) In keeping with its oversize scale, Basel is also set to outfit its superyachts with suites designed by blue-chip artists Jeff Koons and Damien Hirst—a natural next step for the latter, who’s already in the process of bringing his multimillion-dollar work to a body of water.

If all goes as planned, though, the pool of a Las Vegas casino is undoubtedly smaller than the settings Frieze and Basel have been eyeing. Frieze, for one, appears to be planning a voyage between England and France along the the English Channel, which will come complete with reinterpretations of “what it means to be on a cruise in the post-colonial age.” According to Victoria Sidell, Frieze Fairs’s director, that means bingo nights and cabaret—an experience that collectors can remember for the ages by purchasing one of the rubber dinghies that will have accompanied them on the ride, which will each be designed by artists who have “responded enthusiastically to the potential of this medium.” (The proceeds, according to Sidell, will be donated to charity.)

As for Basel, the Art Newspaper is betting that the fair will float on down to its usual haunt: the nonstop party zone that is Miami Beach. Rest assured, though, that the company is thinking bigger than that. From the sound of it, as described by Basel’s global director, the company has come to consider its “radical alternative to the traditional land-locked art fair” to be revolutionary, “chim[ing] with an art world that increasingly operates without borders, both aesthetically and commercially.”

There’s no word, however, on how either fair plans to prevent the disasters that have increasingly plagued artworks that make their way onto superyachts. Here’s hoping those at both fairs, plus those who make it only their lists—both, naturally, are planning to keep things invite-only—take care to avoid a repeat of that time a Jean-Michel Basquiat fell victim to a voyage at sea, where it scared a billionaire’s children enough that they threw corn flakes at it. (Apparently under the impression that it was just “some painting,” the yacht’s crew attempted to remedy the situation by simply wiping the crumbs off the canvas.)

Related: The Most Absurd Reasons That Artworks Have Been Damaged, From Champagne Corks to Cornflakes