Let’s face it: No one can ever top Russell Simmons shutting down not just a basically impossible-to-get-into Yayoi Kusama installation but also an entire museum for a night to celebrate his first anniversary with Ciara. But that doesn’t mean you can’t carry on his legacy by giving the Kusama fan in your life a miniature, lacquer-painted resin version of one of her signature motifs: a polka-dot pumpkin.
Kusama Pumpkin, $280, store.moma.org.
If you happen to be dating someone who already has everything, well, this pool float in the shape of a blown-up iPhone featuring one of Cindy Sherman’s signature selfies is just for you. Bonus: Each comes with a premium gift box and an enviable drawstring swim bag.
Cindy Sherman Oops Phone Float, $250, mocastore.org.
Give your partner a confidence boost and your bedroom a sensual glow with this neon sign by the street artist WhisBe.
I Fucking Love Fucking You neon by WhisBe, $7,500, 1stdibs.com.
You also don’t have to fret about your love already owning this one—unless, that is, you’re dating Cher, who once owned this black underwire lace bra. (Thankfully, it comes with photographic evidence that it’s not just any old hand-me-down.)
Cher-owned black underwire lace bra with photograph of Cher, 1stdibs.com.
We’re going to assume that if you take your love’s appreciation for Jeff Koons, the world’s second most expensive artist, seriously, you won’t blink at an $11,000 price tag. Before going ahead with your purchase, however, a word of caution: Thanks to an incident at Art Basel Miami in 2016, it’s public knowledge that the porcelain pups are prone to shattering.
Jeff Koons: Balloon Dog, $11,000, mocastore.org.
Perhaps to celebrate the fact that Tracey Emin has put her enfant terrible days in the past, one craftsy Etsy user has re-created the artist’s seminal 1998 installation, My Bed, documenting a days-long post-breakup fog in which she subsisted on alcohol and stayed put in her bedroom. Unlike the original, however, there are no condoms in this version; instead, everything is made out of Lego. (Don’t forget to help your partner in assembling all 215 pieces.)
*Art: LEGO Bed Model (Tracey Emin - My Bed) by Little Big Art, $243, etsy.com.)
For those who don’t have the patience for instruction manuals, this cardboard cutout of Emin should take less than a minute to prop up, ensuring that your partner always has company.
Tracey Emin cardboard cutout (lifesize or miniature), $20, eBay.com.
This baseball cap by Nico Fontana might not be for everyone, but it’s certainly perfect for some!
Gay Mom Baseball Cap, $40, printedmatter.org.
This snow globe, by the artists Nora Ligorano and Marshall Reese, comes with the added bonus of sending the right message when you’re upset with your partner, too.
Fuck Snow Globe by Ligorano/Reesem, $70, newmuseumstore.org.
Lu Zhang’s ceramic cocktail vessels are ideal for a date by the pool. (Don’t forget to bring along your Cindy Sherman float.)
Special Special Edition No. 22 Coconut by Lu Zhang, $180, specialspecial.com.
Grant your partner permission to explore via Alice Lang’s boob mug, which is in fact an “atomically correct replication of the artist’s body, complete with nipples, freckles, moles,” produced by 3-D scan.
Alice Lang Boob Mug/Vessel, $80, newmuseumstore.org.
69 Clear Tote, $21, mocastore.org.