A Methodical Approach to Rating Michael B. Jordan’s Instagram Thirst Traps

It seems to be that if there is one thing the actor loves more than working out to keep up his fit physique, it’s documenting the exercise with a post on Instagram.

__Michael B. Jordan__ in *Fruitvale Station*  
 “I was on All My Children at 17, and I had to do my first ever sex scene. I like to make things real, and it was one of those moments. He [pointing at his crotch] doesn’t know there’s a script, so I said to the actress, ‘I apologize if he moves, and I apologize if he doesn’t.’ Everything worked out cool: It’s not a sex tape.”  
 Givenchy by Riccardo Tisci vest.
Photographer: Juergen Teller Stylist: Simon Robins

Michael B. Jordan can do just about anything on screen—he commands the camera in serious dramatic films like Fruitvale Station, dazzles in romantic comedies (see: That Awkward Moment) and kicks ass in superhero films (he’s been in not one but two Marvel franchises). As the villainous Erik Killmonger in Black Panther, Jordan shines in his third Ryan Coogler film, cementing his status as the director’s muse. But there’s one more endeavor at which the actor excels—lifting weights in his garage and posting about it on Instagram.

Rating Michael B. Jordan’s top thirst traps on Instagram is no easy task—it requires a modicum of restraint and a methodical approach—but it must be done because it seems to be that if there is one thing the actor loves more than working out to keep up his fit physique, it’s documenting the exercise with a post on Instagram. For the sake of the Marvel cinematic universe, we have rated 8 of Michael B. Jordan’s thirst traps in terms of Vibranium—the mysterious meteoric element built into Black Panther’s suit to keep him indestructible. Ignore the fact that many of his posts where he’s shirtless and in the midst of a workout are actually sponsored content, and enjoy the gift that Michael B. Jordan seemingly never stops giving.

This photo set is a carousel of a fully clothed Michael B. Jordan, but a thirst trap doesn’t always necessitate (partial) nudity—sometimes, it’s best to leave a little bit to the imagination.

Rating: 4 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

How are there dirty footprints on the mats when no shoes are to be found in the photo? You can only see Michael B. Jordan’s arms in this one, but the combination of a power stance and basketball shorts save this from being a total dud of a thirst trap.

Rating: 2.5 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

Jordan is not shirtless in this video, and he spends the entire time on the ground, but he gets points for the motivational caption.

Rating: 3 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

This photo was taken on a boat, not at the gym, but it is still a shirtless photo of Michael B. Jordan, and he’s sitting next to some other unidentified shirtless man, so it still places on this list.

Rating: 4 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

Who can resist a mean mug and a mid-swing pose? We could all use whatever tips MBJ has for getting his deltoids so fit, too.

Rating: 4 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

See, he’s always working, even if that means spending his free time training for Black Panther in his own garage. Both his abs and his fans thank him for his tenacity and commitment.

Rating: Rating: 4 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

This intense caption paired with the fact that MBJ looks like he’s maybe seconds away from being knocked out in the boxing ring knocks this photo down a couple Vibranium grams.

Rating: 3.5 out of 5 Vibranium grams.

This is perhaps the artsiest of all his gym photos, with a black and white aesthetic and a blurry reflection of MBJ in the mirror while he holds his boxing stance. Plus, just look at those lats.

Rating: Rating: 4.5 out of 5 Vibranium grams (there’s no such thing as a perfect score, not even for superheroes).

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