Beyoncé’s Ex-Drummer Has Accused Her of Using Witchcraft To Murder Her Pet Kitten
“Dark magic” and “extreme witchcraft” are also among the many charges.
There’s no shortage of people who consider Beyoncé to be absolutely spellbinding, but this week, one of them took that opinion to a whole new, very literal level. On Thursday, The Blast shared that it had obtained court documents in which Beyoncé’s former drummer, Kimberley Thompson, reportedly accused Bey of subjecting her to “dark magic,” “extreme witchcraft,” and even “magic spells of sexual molestation” over the course of the seven years that she worked with her—a period of time which, from her point of view, was essentially a “campaign of harassment.”
The complete list of Thompson’s complaints includes the “loss of many jobs,” theft of homes,” and “magic spells on my lovers” and places the blame on Bey for “numerous broken relationships.” As if that weren’t dark enough, Thompson also went so far as to allege that on top of all of that, Beyoncé is responsible for the murder of her pet kitten.
If Thompson has an idea of Beyoncé’s potential motive, it hasn’t yet been made public. (Which isn’t exactly surprising, given that she also apparently believes that Beyoncé is tapping her phones and controlling her finances.) Still, even with an alleged kitten murder on the line, a judge denied Thompson’s request for a temporary restraining order.
While others have been equally dismissive of the idea that Beyoncé, a loving mother of three who harbors affection for even her “mommy pouch,” would harm a living creature, let alone one that’s the picture of innocence, it should come as no surprise that others have not. It was just in 2016, for example, that certain right-wing circles orchestrated a full-on attack on the performance artist Marina Abramović—and none other than then-presidential candidate Hillary Clinton—for practicing satanism, with only an email in which Abramović invited Clinton’s campaign chairman, John Podesta, over for some “traditional soups” as evidence.
As benevolent as Beyoncé can be, it doesn’t seem like she’s been inviting people over for soup as of late. (If she has, anyway, our invitation must have gotten lost in the mail.) But she and Jay-Z have, on the other hand, been the subject of—and even courted—Illuminati conspiracy theories for years. In fact, as recently as this past June, they set off a whole new set of rumors as for filming their “Apeshit” music video at the Louvre—and, more specifically, outside of its Illuminati-associated I. M. Pei pyramid.
If Beyoncé really is a witch, though, that’s not to say it’ll harm her perfectly curated public image. Lana Del Rey, after all, has been just fine in the year since she came clean about her love for casting a good ole hex.
Related: Helena Bonham Carter Is Reportedly In Touch With the Late Princess Margaret, via a Psychic
Fall 2016, the Season of the Witch
Loewe bag; Marc Jacobs shoes.
Valentino jacket and gown; Stuart Weitzman boots.
Miu Miu coat and skirt. Heather Huey bonnet; Caroline Constas neck collar (both throughout).
From left: DKNY jacket; Morgenthal Frederics sunglasses. Prada cape; J.W. Anderson dress and corset; the Frye Company boots. Chanel dress and brooches. Gucci jacket, shirt, and skirt.
Clockwise, from left: Kenzo dress and top; the Frye Company boots. Junya Watanabe Comme des Garcons jacket, T-shirt, and leggings; Louis Vuitton boots. Philosophy di Lorenzo Serafini dress; Daang Goodman for Tripp NYC fishnet shirt; Mugler skirt. Prada dress, harness, and charm necklace; Oliver Peoples The Row sunglasses.
Louis Vuitton jacket, dress, and pants; Inez and Vinoodh ring (throughout) and earring. Beauty note: Banish the wattle with StriVectin TL Advanced Light Tightening Neck Cream.
Dsquared2 jacket and skirt.
Chanel dress; Wolford tights; the Frye Company boots.
Michael Kors Collection cardigan; Daang Goodman for Tripp NYC fishnet shirt (throughout); Rosamosario bra; Moncler Grenoble skirt; (right wrist) Robert Lee Morris bracelet; (rings, right hand, from left) Louis Vuitton, King Baby, Louis Vuitton; (left wrist) King Baby bracelet; (left hand) Jennifer Fisher ring; Alexander Wang boots. Agent Provocateur tights (throughout). Beauty note: Legs look enchanting, thanks to Guerlain Les DElices de Bain Perfumed Body Lotion. Pictured here and throughout: Patrick Dougherty’s What the Birds Know, 2015 (a site-specific installation commissioned by the Peabody Essex Museum).
Versace coat; Etro dress; (necklaces, from top, throughout) stylist’s own, Chrome Hearts, Stylist’s own, Lauren Klassen, Chrome Hearts, Isabel Marant; Balenciaga boots. Beauty note: Give the evil eye with Covergirl the Super Sizer Fibers by LashBlast Mascara in Very Black.
Giorgio Armani cape and jumpsuit; (from top) Gigi Burris Millinery hat, Horisaki Design & Handel hat; Haider Ackermann boots.
Blumarine dress; Bottega Veneta bra top; I.D. Sarrieri briefs; Stuart Weitzman boots.
From left: Alberta Ferretti dress; Wolford tights; the Frye Company boots. Alexander Wang bra top, skirt, and boots; (bracelets, right wrist, from top) Robert Lee Morris, Isabel Marant, Chrome Hearts; (bracelets, left wrist, from top) Wendy Nichol, King Baby, Isabel Marant. Beauty note: Cast a different spell with Chanel Rouge Allure Velvet Lipstick in Demoniaque.
Balmain bodysuit; bag from Galaxy Army NavY, New York; Balenciaga boots.
Vetements shirt, jeans, and boots.
From left: Marc Jacobs jacket, dress, and briefs. Marc Jacobs jacket, T-shirt, and jeans; Inez and Vinoodh earring. Marc Jacobs gown. Beauty note: For phenomenal skin, use Olay Regenerist Luminous Light Hydrating Lotion.
From left: Fenty Puma by Rihanna jumpsuit; Balenciaga boots. Jacquemus jacket and pants; Michael Kors Collection boots. Beauty note: Conjure good hair with Oribe Bright Blonde Radiance & Repair Treatment.
Chloe overalls and sweater; Louis Vuitton boots. beauty note: glow in the dark with giorgio armani prima smart moisture serum.
Alexander McQueen gown; Stuart Weitzman boots.
From left: Viktor & Rolf gown. Azzedine Alaia dress; Tia Mazza veil; Mokuba ribbon (around neck); Inez and Vinoodh ring. For stores, prices, and more, go to Wmag.com/where-to-buy-september-2016.
Hair by Malcolm Edwards at Art Partner; makeup by Dick Page for Shiseido at Jed Root; manicures by Karrie Welch at Anchor Artists. Models: Isabella Emmack at DNA Model Management; Lexi Boling at IMG Models; Jamie Bochert at the Lions NY; and Odette Pavlova at Next Management.
Christopher Kane dress; Daang Goodman for Tripp NYC fishnet shirt; Louis Vuitton rings; Agent Provocateur tights; Balenciaga boots.
PRODUCTION BY V.l.m. productions; executive producer: stephanie bargas; production coordinator: eva harte; Studio Coordinator: Tucker Birbilis; Lighting Director: Jodokus Driessen; Studio Manager: Marc Kroop; Digital Technician: Brian Anderson; Photography Assistant: Joe Hume; fashion assistants: ryann foulke, dena giannini, sam walker; hair assistant: sophie anderson; makeup assistant: gina daddona; special thanks to the City of Salem, Massachusetts; Mayor Kimberley Driscoll; Winter Island Park in Salem; forest river park in salem; salem pioneer village 1630; The City of Salem Parks, Recreation & Community Services department; Salem Maritime National Historic Site; Destination Salem; Peabody Essex Museum; and Patrick Dougherty at stickwork.net