Khloé Kardashian Vehemently Denies That She’s in Talks to Be the Next Bachelorette

She would very much like to be excluded from this narrative.

Khloé Kardashian is not the next Bachelorette and, in fact, she will never be the next Bachelorette. And if you, a Bachelorette producer, hint that she might be the next Bachelorette, she will threaten legal action, and then you’ll have to make Rachel Lindsay the Bachelorette again because she is a lawyer.

In what is truly an absurd turn of events—as befits the absurd time in which we currently exist—Khloé and the rest of the Kardashians are now feuding with Bachelor franchise creator Mike Fleiss. It seems to have started last week, when word broke of the Jordyn Woods/Tristan Thompson cheating scandal heard ’round the world. Shortly after, Fleiss started a rumor that he and the family were in talks to have Khloé take the lead role in the next season of the reality show, prompting Khloé and her big sis Kim not only to shut down those rumors left, right, and center, but also to threaten to sue the entire Bachelor operation for spreading false information.

If you’re wondering why, exactly, the Kardashian-Jenners decided to hash this all out on Twitter rather than simply waiting for the next season to premiere, thus proving that Khloé is not the next Bachelorette then friend, you don’t know much about the way things work in 2019. The family seems to be taking the whole situation very personally, to the point of getting actual lawyers involved, although it’s unclear how suing over an easily disproven throwaway tweet would go.

After all the back-and forth, Fleiss conceded on Twitter that the Kardashians didn’t have the sense of humor necessary for the spot and that while he offered to help Khloé find “love,” she and the show weren’t a match. See the Very Serious Drama unfold, tweet by tweet, here:

Also worth mentioning is this screenshot Kim shared of her asking Khloé and momager Kris Jenner about the rumors in a truncated version of their storied family group chat. “Ewwww I mean put some respeck on my name,” Khloé responded. So, there.

Related: Kim Kardashian Defends Khloé Kardashian After Tristan Thompson’s Second Cheating Scandal

Khloé Kardashian’s Bob, Hailey Baldwin’s Rosy Eyeshadow, and More of the Best Beauty Instagrams of the Week

Khloé Kardashian wears a layered bob. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Mayowa Nicholas shows off a glowing complexion. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Fernanda Ly sports a head of braids. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Barbara Palvin wears a sultry cat eye. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Indya Moore rocks ombré eyeshadow. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Magdalena Frackowiak dresses up a simple pony with a bow. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Hailey Baldwin wears rosy eyes and lips. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Beyoncé sports shimmery violet eyeshadow. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Candice Swanepoel pairs glowing skin with a red lip. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Josephine Skriver wears simple feline liner. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Jorja Smith sports a blotted cherry lip. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Georgia May Jagger keeps it simple with cascading waves. Photo courtesy of Instagram.

Jennifer Lopez wears a sleek high pony. Photo courtesy of Instagram.